Coming Home

Hours past by…
Days gone by…

Mentally worn,
But peace of mind found
With a bleeding heart,
And a mind torn.

Pieces come together,
Jigsaws to be matched
Love is found, Never lost

Time was needed,
to heal this pain…
Time was required,
to correct the path

Help still required,
from you, my love
Help still needed,
by you, my friend

Help is welcomed
by you, my beloved
Help is accepted,
from you, my life

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A Story of…

A Story of…

Oh why this feeling, once more
Supposed to be something from the past
Never to appear again,
So I thought…

Spikes are back in the head, every day
A constant state of pain
Commencing at the break of dawn,
So I sense…

§

Is it worry?
Is it strain?
Or just another chapter in this game?

Must hold on
To the small things that matter,
Must be thankful
For what I receive and have,
And above all…
Must cherish and respect
Those close and care,

§

My heart belongs to you,
My wealth is my love for you,

§

While you calm my spirit with your kisses
And ease the discomfort with your touch
I search for the source
Hidden in the depths of my soul…

**%%&%%**

Version 2

Decisions

Expect the unexpected… so they say… I guess it means be ready for change. Be ready for things to happen and not necessarily for the good. Do we really have to? Is life so easily disrupted if you do not expect the unexpected? Even when you have that mindset of expecting the unexpected, unexpected things do happen and will happen. You never really can plan it, right?

There are moments that those unexpected things have a huge impact on what comes next in your life. You seek for something different, seek answers to questions you have and without realising you stepped into a roller coaster going high speed along a track to end where you never thought you would be. Nothing is the same. Everything is different… or so it seems…

We all make mistakes. We all do things planned or unplanned that seem right at the time, but end up being wrong. We atone for our mistakes. We say sorry if those mistakes affect people you care. No matter what you do, no matter how much you think about it, you will have to make decisions and those decisions affect people not just in a good way. Decisions can hurt people. They can hurt people you care about, you love. They can hurt people you hold dear, you like no matter how long you actually know them.

The road is never straight. Even when the design is straight, traveling on the road is never on a straight line. It swirls, it bends, it cries, it climbs, it descends… Each step forward makes you leave behind something and at the same time it gathers more experience to take with you. Sometimes it is hard to leave something behind. Sometimes it is easy. Sometimes you loose something on the way and wish you didn’t. Sometimes you gain something or pick something up. That something is sometimes good and sometimes a burden.

Everything that happens when traveling the road has a purpose. We know that if we want to know it. We accept it more easily when it is good things happening to us. We have it more difficult to accept when things happen that are hard. Everything is an experience we learn from, or better said should learn from. We have the power to make the decisions in our lives if we want to. Every decision you take is yours to take and yours to carry with you. They are part of making you who you are as a person.

I am making decisions right now. Some of them scare me. Some of them give me a feeling of relieve, that finally I made them. Some decisions make me sad. Every decision though, is my responsibility and only I am accountable for them. No matter the impact on others, I carry the responsibility with me down on the road of the next chapter of my life. The next 1 to 2 years will be hard but with the love I receive I trust that all will be good. I trust in us. Thank you for your trust.

Listening!

Your mind wonders away into a void where only you seem to understand what is going on. You sit on a chair, look out the window while absorbing impressions. Autumn leaves are passing by. They travel distances unknown. The blue sky is covered by clouds that resemble objects and figures. Fantasy plays with you. Only lack of imagination will spoil the experience of an adventure you see being played before you.

Then it comes. It smacks you in the face. You run into a concrete wall with high speed. Hard reality knocks you back on your feet, back to earth, back to the now and what is deemed as so important. All that dreaming and wondering around in a fantasy, is not what you should waste your time on. You cannot just waste your time looking out a window and do nothing. This seriously is very unproductive behaviour…

So here we are… We are defined with what we do for a living. It sits in our culture that we define somebody with what that person is doing as an occupation, as work. One of the first questions you get asked, when talking for the first time to somebody is; “What do you do?” as in “What is your occupation?”. You answer most likely with a similar phrase as this one; ”I am a student”; “I am a lawyer”; “I am an engineer”. Your answer allows to set a picture that the questioner can relate to and the tone of exchange and conversation is as such set. Having no occupation, saying you are un-employed, or that you do nothing is received with silence or a frowning face… Euphemisms are used to mask that you are by definition inactive in the rat race by using the phrase “I am in between jobs”; “I am looking for new opportunities and challenges”; and others…

No matter how you look at it, we answer with the intend to inform about our main activity, with the knowledge (and in some cases hope) that it will give you a level of status. It is that status we deem important. Being unemployed is not something you want to communicate. Main reason, it puts you in the bottom section of the status ladder. We communicate our profession as who we are and preferably we infuse the title we use with some more fancy wording in the hope we are put higher up the status ladder. It is all about the first impression we make. The same goes for the set of clothes you are wearing. We judge every person all the time. My argument is that we discriminate people in forming an opinion about somebody when we box them in their profession and occupation to define who they are. We form an opinion of someone before we even known the person.

Next time you meet somebody new and you start a conversation, try very hard to not ask anything about that person. Try and have a conversation about some topic that fits the occasion and avoid getting trapped in forming an opinion about the person by just looking t their clothes or shoes, before you actually had a meaningful conversation. My experience is that the less you know about somebody, the more you might be inclined to listen to what that person has to say without being prejudiced. Especially in those cases, where you would have boxed people into their boxes, where the box makes you to form a more sceptical or negative opinion about them. Avoiding this, stops you from defining up front an opinion about the person and might give you a chance to enrich experiences by hearing what others have to say more objectively. Try it… It is worth doing it!

Day and Night

An ode to the coffee drinker…

The cycle repeats itself, on and on… Light becomes darkness and darkness becomes light. A vicious circle that seems endless. What is the cause? What is the reason behind this? Are we doomed to continue the process continuously, everyday and endlessly….IMG_8494

Come marching in are our heroes of the light…. Drink your coffee everyday. Battle the darkness by drinking the black tar away so it can make room for day. Light is created by you… our heroes. Drink that black coffee and let light shine on us and the day is ours again. The more you drink, the more of you drink, the more light can break through and stay.

But then comes that moment during the day, that our heroes tire… They cannot keep up with the pace. They try hard to battle the odds until the tipping point is reached and the odds are stacked against them, against us all. That moment where the black takes the upper hand again.

IMG_8496We try different things to turn the tide. We use milk, soya and any other means to battle the black, we use sugar and sweeteners to sweeten up the bitter taste of loss… We try, but cannot prevail. Darkness sets in again during the evening and our heroes throw the towel in the ring. Night is back…

Rest… Recover from today… Tomorrow comes another day…. Our heroes will make the effort to push the black away and create the light for us. When waking up, fresh in the morning, a new day of battling the darkness begins. While we start the morning with drinking the black away the cycle begins again…  Be sure, light will be created for us to live in… Let it be said… Believe!

Coffee drinkers!

With each sip you take, you are helping to take a little bit of darkness out of this world. With each sip you take in the morning, you create space and time to be filled with light… and a new day shines through. Let that other story about the sun and whatever science wants you to believe not tell you differently! Have faith in your heroes and night will become day again…